I’m one of those people who has complete faith in what is to come in my life. Better things are ahead. I spend my free time working on my self-love, my own healing, and introspection. I move myself forward, overcome old ways of thinking and being, and just generally get myself to healthier and happier mental spaces for me. The hard part comes when you feel like you’ve moved mountains in that way, and nothing has changed much in your outer life. Like you’re still waiting for the really good stuff.
There are No Timelines
Sometimes it gets me down. Why? Because I feel amazing. Like I’ve lifted loads off my back in so many ways. Worked my butt off to overcome so much. And where does it take me? Nowhere? Why haven’t I found work that resonates with me more deeply? Where is the great man that is supposed to come into my life? And why am I still working on paying my debts with no increases in my income or monthly budget yet? When does that good stuff happen?
It’s a long road sometimes. And I can only say this because I’ve come a long way already. While I can taste the big things ahead – I know they’re coming – but my faith in that comes from the past. It’s evidence of what is possible for me. The times that I’ve felt this way and then suddenly everything changed for the better. It’s like things just suddenly came into alignment, and I was ready, and the Universe said “GO!”
I have faith in these things because it’s happened to me before at different times in different ways. From me being laid off from a job I hated and allowing me to make a new start with a great new job – to a woman I didn’t even know telling me that I should divorce the husband I didn’t love so we could both make a new start, and I asked him that day for a divorce. It was all meant to be and amazing in what followed.
You Will Be Guided
You really have to watch for the signs though. The big ones you couldn’t miss (like a job layoff), or as subtle as a feeling you need to go to the store when you really don’t need anything – it could be that your soul mate is there waiting to meet you. You can’t get stuck in doubt or get caught up in victim mentality. You have to be open and trust that the Universe has your back. And you have to be patient.
And no, I’m not always patient. I cry sometimes feeling hopeless. I feel crazy alone and so frustrated at my current situation sometimes. But the Universe sends me bits of hope. Whether it’s an oracle card I pull from a deck, a friend that reaches out to support me, or even reading back in my journals to times things were going right for me. It all shows me in small ways that I need to keep the faith. I will get there. Maybe not on my timeline, but when the Universe has everything aligned. You have to trust and believe.
Keep the Faith – Even in the Dark
How do you hang on though through long stretches and not lose hope? It can be really hard. I did readings with psychics 5 years ago that said my life partner would be coming to me soon. And 5 years later, no sign of him. It can make you lose hope, that’s for sure. And often times I do. I have myself a little pity party and eat a pizza or stuff my face with pasta. And that’s ok too, as long as you don’t stay in that dark place. I certainly have for long periods at times, but I always manage to drag myself out of it. Keeping the faith is sometimes easier said than done.
People talk about finding the good in your life in the moment and being grateful for what you have. I have to agree that this too can be helpful. Especially when you look back on where you came from and what you have overcome. Personally, I found my way out of a pattern of unhealthy relationships where I was completely self-sacrificing. So much so that I really had no idea who I was anymore.
In the years since I put a stop to that, I have a very healthy level of self-love and I know who I am again, and I follow my own path. I am so grateful for not just the realization I had years ago about all of that, but also of the time I’ve had to find my way to loving myself, my life, and who I am. So in those lonely moments, I remember that – and I’m grateful I am here, alone, loving myself, peaceful and happy.
Find the Joy Right Now
I think we also need to stop waiting for stuff, and find the joy in the now. What would be inspiring and fun for you to do today? Maybe paint a picture? Go for a hike? Help your elderly neighbors clear their yard? Snuggle your dogs for a while? What would light you up today? If you can find that, you will not only find your way out of the sadness and hopelessness, but also start living a life of joy. Joy is in finding the things that light you up and make you happy. It is also how you will find the things you are most passionate about.
When will the great stuff come that I am hoping for? I don’t know. All I know is that I am going to keep taking great care of me, following my instincts and the signs, and hanging on to the faith that there are even better days ahead. And for now, I will bask in this moment and find the joy in my life. There are so many things I’m passionate about and enjoy doing. I am safe, I am warm, I am loved and I am happy. There are so many that can’t say that. I embrace all of this, and my amazing life and journey, and I find peace in this moment.
A book you might like to read is Ainslie MacLeod’s The Old Soul’s Guidebook: Who You Are, Why You’re Here, & How to Navigate Life on Earth